Not everyone who grew up with a parent with an alcohol or other drug problem will have difficulties in college. But most students who grew up in this environment have vivid childhood memories of disappointment, fear and shame. These experiences may still influence how you think about yourself, relate to others, tackle new situations and act in social situations.

In college, these experiences and feelings may seem especially troublesome as you are trying to separate from your family, develop your own identity and make decisions more independently.

If you are a child of an alcoholic or substance abuser, and whether you live at home or at school, it is common to feel:

• confused about what constitutes "normal" behavior
• guilty about growing apart from your family
• worried about siblings still at home
• resentful for not having had a better childhood
• lonely and isolated from classmates
• pressured to excel academically, in sports or other activities

These feelings are all very normal, but if ignored, can have a negative impact on your health, schoolwork, relationships and social life. You also need to be on alert for other risky behaviors: being attracted to others who drink a lot or use other drugs, binge-eating/purging or starving yourself, or getting involved sexually with a lot of different people. Confronting these feelings and behaviors head-on and dealing with them now will help insure they don’t get in the way of your success later.

You also may be concerned about family members who are still using alcohol or other drugs. This can be upsetting and distracting. But don’t be tempted to try to "fix the problem." It was not your responsibility to solve the problem when you were a child, and it is not now. It may be tough to let go and move on, but getting help is up to the person with the problem, not you.